Wednesday, December 21, 2011

A simple guidemap to wedded bliss

A friend of mine posted this article on Facebook about "Why You're Not Married" by Tracy McMillan.  Sorry if you are reading that and you are married, but it is the title of the piece.  It is written to women who want to get married;  apparently women who want to get married for the sake of getting married.  So, why can't these ladies find themselves a man?  Why can't they "seal the deal"?  Simple, they are shallow, selfish, slutty, lying bitches.  And they are not good enough.  No really, that is what she says.  Seriously.  Read the article.  I read it about four times to see if I could glean something good out of it.

Now, I am not an idiot.  I know that being in a relationship requires you to make sacrifices and compromises, but McMillan actually suggests that women should be more like Kim Kardashian.  If you are a woman, and you want to be like Kim Kardashian (warning: I don't really know who that is) then by all means do so.  It is your life, right?  But to suggest that you "smile" and "wiggle" to avoid scaring men is repulsive.  Just keep your opinion to yourself, smile and be a good doting wife.  How else is a reader supposed to take that?

Beyond that I think that McMillan is painting with pretty broad strokes.  I am sure that there are shallow, selfish, slutty, lying women who want to get married, but are having a hard time.  I am sure that there are shallow, selfish, slutty, lying women who are happily married.  To suggest that in all cases the reason that a woman can't find a man that she wants to marry is because of six simple (and offensive) reasons is really undercutting how complex human relationships are.  Off the top of my head, I can think of many other reasons why two people don't get married.  Here are a few: finances, career, distance, different goals, children, fear, lack of interest, family pressure, peer pressure, illness and, yes, religious differences.  I am not going to expand on those and I would like to note that the list is not exhaustive, but I think you get the point.  Simply saying that X or Y is why someone is not married is a bullshit oversimplification, especially when applied to such a diverse demographic as unwed women (who want to get married).

Anyhow, maybe I am way off base here, and I am a man, so I feel weird writing about women's issues regardless, but this one really got under my skin.  Now that I got that out, would someone please be so kind as to write an article titled "Why You're Not Married to Newt Gingrich"?  I would love to read that.

1 comment:

  1. I adore you more and more with every post you make, Sir.