I must be out of the loop or something.

I am sorry, I have lived outside of the U.S. now for about 5 years.  As such, I have missed out on a few things.  I have family members with children that I barely know (the children, not the family members. Although, the children are also family members).  I am also a bit out of touch with pop culture.  I understand there is a funny show called the Big Bang Theory that sounds great.  Never seen it.  I am consistently about a year behind on popular music, and I rarely watch new movies.  But the thing that pisses me off, the question that really gets me worried about the future is:  Who the hell are the Kardashians, and why does anyone care about them?  Seriously, I have no idea.  Kim.  Who's that?  Khloe? There are two of them?  More?  I am sure I could find out more if I looked into it harder, but I am about 90% sure my brain would fall out if I did. 

Sorry.  Just had to get that out.